Once you had a dream that you realized, but do you know what matters?

It's been a stressful couple of weeks as we await the arrival of Master Sage. Less than three weeks to go. Wow. Seems like we were just finding out about you and now you're almost here. Can't wait to meet you, my son. Your room is ready for you and I think the three of us...your mother, me, and your big bro are as prepared as we are going to get.

I'm looking forward to the small things...Seth sitting next to you on the couch explaining the interpersonal dynamics of the cast of Scooby-Doo, you falling asleep on my chest on the couch, and the look in your Mom's eyes when she holds you. You see, a lot of people think "things" are going to make them happy in life. A faster car, a bigger house, a better salary. But those things are just that. Things. They come and go in one's lifetime. But it's the stuff you can't actually buy that makes it so much more valuable. Never let the pursuit of the tangibles outweigh your attainment of the intangibles. You'll thank me for this advice one day. Until then, you'll still want "the toys". I guess you have me to thank for that as well.

Headline from "What Matters" by Matthew Sweet, 1999

Dreaming is Free

I don't know if most people that know your father would label me as a dreamer. You see, I tend to be rather a realist in my actions and in the way I present myself to others. But lying underneath this layer of pragmatism is someone who does in fact dare to dream. I guess it's part of my nature to strive for more in life and rather than being cynical about things that are out of my reach at this moment, I dream about the attainment and design the course to achieve whatever it is that I want. I don't want to be in a world without dreamers. Your dreams are what lead to your successes.

My life has been a series of successes, failures, challenges and dreams. As I learned to accept myself, failures and all, a funny thing happened along the way. My dreams started to become reality. Funny, that. I always wondered if I didn't have those dreams...would they have ever come true. I can't say for sure.

Dare to dream. It's what makes it fun to get out of bed each morning. And when you look around and see the faces of what is important to you...there will never be a question as to whether or not it was all worth it. It is.

Headline from "Dreaming" by Blondie, 1979

Honesty Is Hardly Ever Heard, And Mostly What I Need From You

The world today is very different from when I grew up...and it will likely be even more different when you boys become adults. It's hard not to become cynical and distrustful when it seems like everyone around you has an ulterior motive. Whatever happened to simply telling the truth? Why must everything be sensationalized nowadays? There was an old saying that "if it's in print, it must be true." Today this is a farce. Honesty is a lost trait in our society.

This does not however mean that it is OK to join the fray of liars, exaggeraters, snake oil salesmen, and sensationalists. Honesty is something that has become so rare, that it has become one of the most admirable qualities an individual can have.

Be honest with your family and they will respect you and value your words and actions. Be honest with your customers in business and they will come back again and again. Most importantly, be honest with yourself. Be true to what you believe and never allow the temptation to undermine who you are. If I can say that I raised two honest boys...I will know I did well.

Headline from "Honesty" by Billy Joel, 1978

Talk is Cheap, and Those Rumors Ain't Nice...

No deep philosophical ideologies today boys. Just wanted to share a bit of good ol' rock n' roll from a band that served as your Father's transition band into the music nut he is today. In 1978, at the ripe age of 13, I first heard a band out of Illinois called Cheap Trick. To this loyal member of the Kiss Army, it was a sound like I had never heard before. There was revolution in the music world going on in England and in small dingy clubs in NY and LA but I wouldn't be exposed to this new sound for a couple of years yet. But Cheap Trick was something very new to me. Their sound was explosive and urgent. It signaled a clear change in the musical landscape and an end to the music of the 70's as the world knew it.

Anyways...on the way to work this morning, head spinning with the uber-responsibilities of a 40-something dad about to have his world turned upside down by Boy #2, Cheap Trick's "Dream Police" fires off those unmistakable opening drum beats. THIS...is what music was made for. To completely take you away to another place. Music serves to mark a time in life. An event. Good times, bad times. But it stirs an emotion. It makes you feel alive.

For three or so minutes your conservative Dad cranked that radio and rocked. Yup, the other drivers figured I was having a meltdown. Who cares. I'm 14 and I'm drivin' a car! Woo-Hoo!

Without further ado...I give you Cheap Trick.

Headline from "Dream Police" by Cheap Trick, 1979

And It Was All Yellow

This morning Seth wakes me up and before firing up the TV says "C'mon Dad, let's pee at the same time." And a blog topic was born. As you most probably know by the time you read this, boys pee standing up. Girls, sitting down. God made it this way because we men don't have time to waste coppin' a squat to pee. We have things to do...places to be. For example, go to any sporting event and check out the line for the ladies' room. No...not acceptable. Hence the creation of the pee trough. We men take a place at the pee trough and get down to business. Remember the rules of the pee trough: 1) Never let arms touch with the guy next to you. 2) Never get caught sizing up the competition. 3) Farting is not only accepted, but encouraged.

You'll never be more thankful for the ability to pee standing up than you will at any street festival. Let's face it...as nasty as us guys can be, those porta-potties are just foul. Another perk is the ability to write your name in the snow. Chicks simply can't pull this one off. We kept your names to four letters each to maximize your ability to sign your name on command. We almost considered naming one of you boys Sebastian. You would have needed a Big Gulp for that one.

So as I stood next to you this morning, being men, I made a mental note to impart the cardinal rule of sharing a bowl. Never, and I mean never, let your streams cross. You know what happened in Ghostbusters.


Headline from "Yellow" by Coldplay, 2000

No Retreat, Baby, No Surrender

Too many people allow life to lead them instead of them leading their life. Life does not always hand you what you want. It's a constant struggle to achieve what you want. This is not meant to be demoralizing. Quite the opposite actually, my young padawans. You can achieve ANYTHING you want in this world. Not always easily, but always achievable. In this country we are privileged to have unlimited opportunity. Never take this opportunity for granted because in many parts of the world opportunity does not exist. All the desire and determination can still leave you wondering where your next meal is coming from.

I've been told I set my bar too high. That means I set goals that are difficult to achieve. So? Who wants to bend down for a low bar anyway? Set your goals high my sons but allow yourselves to fall short sometimes. Without sometimes falling short, how can you know where to set your next bar? A quote I'll always remember is that if you don't fail sometimes, you aren't trying hard enough. There is nothing wrong with failing. Failing is a part of succeeding.

You boys have been given a huge gift. The gift of opportunity. Make the most of it in everything you do. You can achieve whatever it is you set your minds to. Just strive to be the best at whatever that is. I don't care if it's to be the best librarian or the best bowler or the best father...simply be the best you can. And you'll never regret a moment of your lives.

Headline from "No Surrender" by Bruce Springsteen, 1984

Who Are You? Who? Who? Who? Who?

This is a journal for my boys. It's something I set out to do for my first son, Seth, but failed miserably in keeping up with my writings. To be exact, I had three entries. But this time around I'm doing it in blog form instead of on paper, so I'm fooling myself into thinking things will be better.

So what's with the title? Well, it's something my 3-3/4 year old has taken to say when describing the two of us. That's right, kiddo. We are the bad boys of rock n' roll. And soon to be a power trio. From Day One, I exposed Seth to a world of music beyond that of the average infant. He was doin' the "Cretin Hop" to the Ramones before he knew what a Wiggle was. Next came his introduction to ska, and it was love at first skank. From there we moved into some of the classics from Daddy's metal years and "Breaking the Law" by Judas Priest became our official anthem. Heck, it's even the ringtone on my phone when his school calls me. Usually because he's....well, broken the law.

And what is the purpose of this here manifesto? In a nutshell (why in a nutshell by the way?), to impart my thoughts, life experiences, loves, hates, challenges, triumphs, failures, and anything else I can think of to ramble on about to my two boys. Not so much a recap of their childhood events (their mother does a great job of documenting that), but instead a set of lessons and musings that I hope they will one day read and learn what it is that makes up their old man.

I'll wrap this introductory post so as not to use up my words. As if that was ever a concern with me. Speechless, I am not often.

For now...let's leave it at the fact that you boys are the pride of my life and this is my gift to you. Although I'm sure you'd have rather had a pony.

Headline from "Who Are You" by The Who, 1978